I’m exhausted. It’s strange that finding out a better idea of what is going on with the cat has made me feel better. There is still a chance he’s not going to make it, but I don’t know. We’re moving forward with treating it as irritable bowel syndrome. His upper small intestines show signs of irritation. The Vet has put him on prednizone. That’s just great. If he does recover, now he’ll be on steroids. He could all ready jump from the floor to the top of the fridge easily, and could get to the top of the soffett if he got his paws hooked. Now he’ll be like “Who needs stairs? I’ll just jump to the loft from here.”
I’m not sure why I decided to go ahead with the treatment. Yes I do. I think.
The idea is to give the steroids, and him a week to get his weight back up and to start eating on his own. If neither happens then we will have to put him down.
The extra week is me being a true human. Selfish. Human beings are selfish. I know what you’re thinking. ‘I do selfless things all the time.’ You probably are even thinking of examples of things you’ve done. Donated time, money, or food, etc., helped a neighbor build a shed, maybe even voted for an Independent in the US Presidential Election. These of course are just examples. The point is these are not truly selfless acts. Ask yourself why you do them. Is it because it makes you feel good? There something wrong with that statement in that context, eh? What I’m saying isn’t black and white either. There are plenty of exception. Love is an example; a parent’s sacrifice for their child, family in general for that matter. (not all parents and not all families, sad as that is).
I read a story somewhere about a pair of Asian monks, a student and a master I believe. They were walking to town and came to a steam. On the edge of the stream stood a woman trying to get across. The mast pick up the woman and carried her across the stream as he and the student crossed. He set her down on the other side and the monks went on their way. A mile later the student questioned the elder monk. “Master” he said, ” I thought we were not to touch a female, for they can sway the mind from the path.” The elder replied, ” I left the woman at the side of the stream. Did you?”
At the same time love can be an example of selfishness too. Look at me and my example above. Am I being generous by spending the money to extend my cat’s life? or am I being selfish and want to give myself another week with the cat? Perhaps it’s neither. I may simply want to ease the grief and agony my wife is going through, trying to make the decision with me on what we do; keep him alive and hope he doesn’t suffer, or put him to sleep. I know I’m struggling with it.
So I continue to feed him through the tube in his neck (for now) in the hope that he will recover for a bit and have a good extra year or two.
So one more cc of food stuff and off to bed.
Oh, and don’t forget to read the disclaimer in the upper right corner. Good night.
