Character: Patrick

40ish, semi-employed.

I'm thinking that these bone jokes may be hard to swallow, unless you have a really dry sense of humor

What an enormous coccyx

I'm thinking that these bone jokes may be hard to swallow, unless you have a really dry sense of humor

Paddy: I don’t understand why she had to have you come do this Patrick: She said she felt kind of awkward messing around your ischial and pubis area Patrick: I’m inclined to agree with her, it’s weird Paddy: But I … Read More

This week I bring you not just one, but two. Two adorable, fuzzy, rubbable bellies!

Kitty Kam

This week I bring you not just one, but two. Two adorable, fuzzy, rubbable bellies!

Not so sure how I feel about this one. I like the layout, and I like that it looks like a webcam, but the color is too washed out and in my head I cant figure out whose perspective the … Read More

I am the night

The Pawtector

I am the night

This is like our nightly routine. It’s better than the wife’s. She gets a paw across the face. As if to say “See I used the litter box like a good boy.” Edit 2/7/16 – The wife kindly pointed out that … Read More

He is of course talking about the marble scene in "My Fair Lady". Though certainly there is an adult parody of that as well.

[indistinguishable mumbling]

He is of course talking about the marble scene in "My Fair Lady". Though certainly there is an adult parody of that as well.

Now that this one is complete I realize it’s rather absurd. Not that there is this casual conversation about porn, I have those all the time. More like there is this casual conversation about porn with someone wearing Sponge Bob … Read More

Best body builder pants ever!

Brah, do you even lift?

Best body builder pants ever!

You see how I didn’t use the whole round is a shape joke, or the body of a god, too bad it’s Buddha bit! It was a stretch, but I managed to pull myself up from such a heavy set … Read More

I may be on to something here, but how to incorporate the Pike Place Market fish tossing and Evan Stone

“Pike” Place Market, a porn parody

I may be on to something here, but how to incorporate the Pike Place Market fish tossing and Evan Stone

The reality is we really are low on the morning tea. It’s kind of strange how setting up a story about needing to clean up after myself in the shop and the fact that I “donwanna” somehow managed to turn … Read More

It was either this or a book about a Farmer that was into bondage titled "50 Bales of hay"

Mani Pedi Kitty

It was either this or a book about a Farmer that was into bondage titled "50 Bales of hay"

I really like waking up with itchy ear canals and a sore throat at 2 am. Yay for colds! I can’t wait until it gets to the in-controllable runny nose bit. That always makes me laugh.   Patrick: What in the … Read More

I remind you that he also cannot remember to put on pants

Butt first

I remind you that he also cannot remember to put on pants

Christmas time indeed.   Paddy: So you’re making this for Christmas? Patrick: Yup. She never really comes out here so I’m free to work all I want and she’ll never really notice Paddy: Won’t she expect some sort of project to be done … Read More

In this corner...Weighing in at 6 pound...

Table Tennis

In this corner...Weighing in at 6 pound...

As I’m getting older I’m learning that it isn’t so much that I can no longer do the fractions in my head. It’s more like I have a hard time remembering which way I was converting and what way I … Read More

I find it strange that a pair of paper eyes on a stick end up looking like graphics photo shopped into the photo

It’s like the Pat Cave

I find it strange that a pair of paper eyes on a stick end up looking like graphics photo shopped into the photo

So after a bit of an ordeal I am back up and running. Looks like a carriers update borked my phone somehow. At least that’s the best I can figure because when I actually did get the original phone to … Read More